


Something Crazy

by Roblidon



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Implied Smut, M/M, but technically no smut, drunk phone calls, pepperjack, prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-07
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-05-31 20:10:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6485812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roblidon/pseuds/Roblidon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack gets drunk and decides the best thing to do is to call Vernon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Crazy? Nah, Just Trashed

**Author's Note:**

> A prompt from an anon on tumblr. This was a little longer than anticipated but super fun to write. Send me prompts on here or tumblr :)
> 
> ****Jack Walsh read this on his Instagram https://www.instagram.com/p/BHTYdO2jEah/ *************************************

Hey, it’s Vernon! Sorry I missed you, but leave me a message and I’ll ring you back as soon as I can.

“Hey Vernon, ‘s me. Answer your damn phone sometime, would ya? I could be calling about something important, you know. Anyways, call me back.”

Jack hangs up, tapping his forehead with his phone lightly. It’s 1130 at night, and instead of sleeping or catching up on work he’s drinking and calling Vernon. He doesn’t know what he’s expecting, honestly. What would he say if he answered? He sighs, taking another swig of his Guinness. He looks at his phone for a moment, deciding to try again. He puts the phone on speaker and places it on his chest, deciding to lay down and get comfortable. He tries to think about what he’s going to say but get’s cut-off mid thought.

“Hello? Jack?”

Jack sits up quickly, startled by the voice. He hadn’t expected him to answer. His phone flies off his chest, landing on the floor. He scrambles to pick it up, taking it off of speaker and putting it to his ear.

“Yes, hey Vernon it’s me. Sorry to call you so late. I just really wanted to talk to you. How are you? How are things? Doing well?”

Jack hears some muffled sounds on the other end, as though Vernon is stifling a laugh.

“Jack, are you drunk? Did you get drunk without me and then realize how much you miss me? That’s sweet, Jackie-boy.”

Jack doesn’t deny the accusation, feeling a prick of heat in his face. Maybe that is the reason he wanted to call so badly. It’s true, he does quite enjoy drinking with Vernon. He’s such a lightweight and tends to get pretty handsy after just a beer and a half. Last time they went out for drinks, Vernon ended up singing “When Irish Eyes Are Smiling”, dedicating the song to Jack, looking him in the eyes the whole way through, fumbling through it, slurring and messing up the words. 

“Well maybe I am, Vernie….boy. Your name isn’t really good for nicknames, is it? That’s fine. But yes, I am in fact just the slightest bit inebri…inebria…yea I’m a little drunk. And for some reason I wanted to call you. It’s nice to hear your voice. Feels like it’s been so long since we’ve talked.”

“Jack I literally saw you today at work. You’re such a sap right now. You normally aren’t like this, you must be super smashed, dude. Anything exactly you wanted to talk about, or did you just want to hear my silken voice to help soothe you to sleep?”

Vernon puts on a deep voice, breathy, and definitely not what Jack was expecting. It sends a shiver through him and he lets out a shaky breath. Maybe he is a little farther gone than he realized. He closes his eyes and runs his fingers through his hair. He has a sudden idea, something crazy, and his brain-to-mouth filter seems to be malfunctioning.

“Why don’t you talk dirty to me, then? Since you put on such a sexy voice for me.”

A silence falls over the phone, and Jack is afraid that maybe he overstepped a line. He stutters, trying to say something about it being a joke, but gets cut-off before he can finish his thought.

“Oh, so that’s what this is about, huh? Feeling a little lonely without me there, Jackie-boy? How sweet.”

Vernon keeps his voice low, teasing him. Jack runs a hand up his thigh, letting his fingers gently slide over the fabric of his jeans.

“I…perchance you’re right, V. Why don’t you just head over here, then? Help me feel a little less lonely? I’ll leave the door unlocked for you, maybe I’ll open up a bottle of red wine or…”

He trails off, finding it difficult to try and flirt or be suggestive. He hears a low hum on the other end of the line, followed by the sound of keys being picked up.

“Sounds like a plan, I’ll head right over. See you soon, Jack.”

The phone clicks as Vernon hangs up, and Jack just lays there, dumbfounded. Did that really just happen? Is Vernon actually going to come over? His thoughts are swimming and he hardly even notices the knock on his door a few minutes later. He gets up slowly, trying not to stumble as he goes towards the door. He opens it up, revealing the answer to his questions.

“Let’s do something crazy.”


	2. Nasty Little Pepper Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vernon takes matters into his own hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For trash-lovely on tumblr. ;)

Vernon smirks, loving the look on Jack’s face right now. He can definitely tell that he’s been drinking - and not just because of the empty beer cans strewn across Jack’s floor. His eyes are half-open, eyebrows furrowed, mouth open slightly, the tip of his tongue pressed against his left canine. The classic ‘Jack is smashed’ look. He chuckles, wondering what it says about him that he knows  _exactly_  what Jack’s face looks like when he’s drunk.

Vernon steps inside, not waiting for Jack to respond. Jack spins around, pointing a finger at him. Vernon cocks an eyebrow at him, putting one hand on his hip, the other on his chest.

“Who? Me? What’s up, clover-boy? Didn’t think I’d actually show up?”

Jack tilts his head and stutters for a moment, as though he’s trying his very best to come up with a cohesive thought but failing.

“F…first off, pepper boy, yes I am a bit surprised tha’ you’re here. Second off…”

He narrows his eyes and looks around the apartment, like he’s scanning for something. Vernon smirks, enjoying being sober around drunk Jack for once. Jack finally lands his gaze on the fridge and points at it with both hands, snapping his fingers repeatedly.

“Drink! Would you like one? I ‘ave…well shit, I’ve got lots. Come on, come on, look.”

He gestures to him, and Vernon obliges. Jack opens the fridge, revealing that he does in fact have ‘lots’. 

“Planning a party or do I have to call somebody about this?”

Jack blinks slowly at Vernon and after a moment he smiles, one of those open mouthed smiles that always ends in a stupid bout of laughter. He points at Vernon again and then grabs his shoulder firmly.

“Don’t you worry about me, pepper boy. I am in fact planning a party, and you…”

He points again, poking his nose with his pointer finger with a ‘boop’.

“You’re invited! But that’s not for another week, so I’ve got an idea. You should drink with me now.”

Vernon purses his lips, trying his best to keep a straight face as his friend makes a fool out of himself. He looks at the contents of the fridge again, deciding to grab a Dr. Pepper. Jack clicks his tongue in disapproval, but Vernon takes no mind.

“Jack, I think you’ve had a bit more to drink than you can handle. I don’t think we should do anything tonight. But at the party I promise I’ll get shitfaced with you.”

Jack whines and walks over to the living room, throwing himself onto the couch with a dramatic sigh.

“But Vernon, my buddy, I just wanted to have a bit of fun! It’s Saturday, and I know you won’t be goin’ to church tomorrow so why not just have a few drinks and play with me a bit, yea?”

Vernon walks over to the couch, standing in front of it, arms crossed. He had every intention of fooling around a bit, but seeing as Jack is nowhere near sober, that wouldn’t be right. If he was just a little tipsy, sure, but not eight Guinnesses deep. That’s way too drunk to make any type of rational decision.

“Not tonight, Jack. Come on, let me help you into bed, you big baby.”

Jack whines again but doesn’t fight against Vernon’s grip on his arm. They walk to his bedroom together, Vernon practically carrying Jack there. Jack flops onto his bed and moves over so that there’s a big space on the bed next to him. He pats it and looks up at Vernon with this… _look_  that sends a chill down his spine.

“If you won’t drink with me, then at least lay with me for a bit? Keep me company?”

Vernon checks his watch. It’s already almost 1 in the morning, but Jack was right. It’s not like he has church in the morning.


End file.
